This is dedicated to the one(s) I love .... (gotta sing it)

Yesterday was my 37th birthday.

I was sick for the entire day and mighty worried I was in for a pretty miserable few days. I went to work and did my thing (I know I should have stayed home, but that is not the sort of place I work in) and the gals at my office threw a little lunch time party for me, complete with chinese food and cake ... and card and song and even a gift certificate for a hair-do at a local salon (okay - so you know your "do" is a "don't" when you get a certificate like this from your co-workers... unclench, Eyvi - I know I've been bitching about my hair for months ... I'm just funnin'). To them, I say TYVM ... for making me gain 5 more pounds... no, I'm kiddin' again - I am so touched. Thanks guys - you ROCK!

I don't plan to spend a whole bunch of time yaking about the 'day' itself. It's just that birthdays have a tendancy to cause somewhat of a retrospective thought path ... especially when one is camped out on the couch feeling shitty - not to mention sorry for themselves. To that end, I give you this little glance into the mind of your blog bud Dani.

I have been realizing lately just how much this little cyber friend group has come to mean to me. For a little back ground: When I was a teenager, I had scads of pals and a handful of real friends. I went through stints of big time popularity in junior high only to plunge 'small fish' like into the ocean of high school and suffered the sting of being cast out. As I entered adulthood, the rigors of life seemed to somewhat stand in the way of most of my friendships. There have been a couple that have endured. I guess the point I am having trouble landing on is that my interpersonal relationships are seemingly more work that I want (or am able) to put into them.

And then, I got this fortune cookie that said "the only way to have a good friend is to be one". Up until recently, I might have scoffed at that statement ... as to a select few, I have been a friend of epic proportions... and I can assure you in most cases this was far from reciprocated. I had become somewhat of a "humbug" where 'friendships' were concerned. Enter Eyvi Sprite. (PS - I have left out the "links" intentionally ... just for this post)

It was she who got me into the idea of blogging. She showed me how she set her own page up. For those of you who don't know this already, she's a pretty cool chiquita. I am very grateful to have her as a part of my life. We don't hang out outside of our working relationship, but I consider her to be my friend. She showed me this world of blogging and it was at her continued insistance that I started reading again. Both of these have brought me an immeasurable sense of happiness, and I am eternally grateful to her for being so damned pushy about bringing them to me. :)

 Then the other day, Mark announced he was retiring from writing his blog. I felt physically sick at this thought. Mark's posts are tremendously funny, but also very well written. It is a talent to be able to impart humour through the written word and he does it with finesse. His posts always bring a smile to my face ... and the idea of not reading his thoughts ... on - whatever ... was a very sad prospect, indeed.

This morning, I got up (feeling somewhat better than I had upon going to sleep), said good morning to my family, poured a coffee and proceeded to grab my laptop and head for the kitchen table. Upon entering my google reader, I noticed immediately that Mr. Mark had written a post. My heart actually lept with joy. His post was eloquently written, poignant and not at all funny - but I hung off every word. Imagine that, Mark - even when you are not funny, you still have an audience that awaits -  breath baited (well ... if coffee and the scent of 'morning' counts as baited) for your next offering.

See, Mark is having what he refers to as a "hard time". I would refer to what he is experiencing as blistering pain. I guess perspective is a very powerful tool. I admire him for his strength and even for his desire to escape his situation by entering the blogisphere from time to time ... 1) because somewhere his mind has told him he needs to do so in order to preserve his strength reserves ... and, 2) because he does this by entertaining all us "Bleaks" (that's my newly coined word for bloggy geeks and freaks ... and YEAH - I stole it from a show I don't even watch). I won't go on anymore about him, since he'll likely hunt me down and drown me in some toilet water, but he was the biggest inspiration for this post (today, at least). Mark, I think you have a heart the size of Texas and I am better for having had the chance to meet you. Please don't scare me like that again.

Then there is Admin. Oh man - I have a serious cyber crush on him and all his stabby goodness. (Don't worry, man - stalking takes too much time away from lazing around on the couch - you are safe as a bug in a rug) Doran's posts are so full of good stuff that they pretty much defy description. He can be vile and down right evil by times, but his writing talent is blinding (and although I may have to live in fear of violent and bloody retribution at his hands for having said so, it is glaringly obvious that his heart is as big as the Great White North). To each and every one of his words I cling, as though savouring that last bite of turtle cheesecake ... I know it's not good for me, but I simply have to have more.

Spot, you are a rock star. There is just no other way to sum it up. You are like Uber Mom  .. and  side splittingly funny ... and that friggen family of yours cracks me up ... and then there is that talent of yours ... geez. You are someone to aspire to. Plus you were the first person who started following my blog that I didn't know personally or hadn't started following first. That was super cool. Thank you for that.

Cynica, I met you through Mark's blog  -drawn in by your screen name ... I mean who wouldn't be drawn to a name like Cynica Sarcastimos??? And you do not dissapoint. You are a seriously cool chiquita, too... and not just because your husband works for National Geographic, though I have to admit that is freakin' cool. Your writing is awesome to read. It is crazy to meet so many people who have this talent ... this incredible talent and they are not being published. Seems like a crime in so many ways.

Cindy Lou - I have loved you for most of my life. This is merely a way for us to share something we have always both had an interest in ... 'course, as ever- I pale in comparison ... but I wanted to say so here, since I do not do a very good job of keeping touch with you anywhere else. You are always in my heart.

Meeko Fabulous ... you are the bestest bitch I know! I can't even tell you how many times you have made me cry with laughter. You are seriously fab-U-lous in every way that I know you. I'm so happy I found your blog.

And Geep. I don't know you (obviously), I know only the things you post on your blog. I know your slick witted humour and your incredibly sage insight and depth of intelligence on a broad range of topic-ry (yes, my name is Dani, and I like to make up words). I think you'll roll your eyes at me 'cause I ... well I have a crush on you too. Yep - that's how twisted I am ... you and Doran, together - my ideal man. Wow - I need to ask for my therapy money back. Seriously, though ... you are a cool dude in a loose mood and I really enjoy reading your stuff too.

Brite - your taste in music ROCKS the CASBAH! I haven't read a huge amount of your writing, but look forward to anything you do write on other blogs n such. It's awesome to me to be making friends literally all over the world ... yes, I know how bad my geek just shone through that statement.

I'll finish off with Xtreme. Dude, you don't write often enough. I think your sense of ha ha is bang on. I also respect you in ways that you'll never know for writing that post about your wife. That was wicked cool of you. (Coming from a fellow wife .. and self proclaimed Bleak, that may not be taken as a compliment - but it is sure meant as one.) I want more - more - more (typical woman) of you and all your Princess Bride watchin' glory. Very happy to have read what I have so far, though. Now - stack up the orange pylons and wrap up construction already!! I miss you.

I have written this in no particular order except how my river of crazy flows ... if I have forgotten to mention someone, it is more than likely just because you maybe haven't written in a while and didn't make it into my conscious thoughts while I was typing ... not at all because I don't thoroughly love to read you and enjoy your own brand of blogging. I am ever grateful to have found this medium and all of you.

You make me happy in the pants :) ... perhaps most of you in parts a little farther North of said pants ... but happy none the less! ***Why is it that I can not pull that statement off??? Am I sayin' it wrong or something? A little help, D - if you are still awake and reading...


Just wanted to take a minute ... okay - an hour and a half to say so.