Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Slowly Crazy Going Am I ...

My baby started school this year.

Had I mentioned this?

My B.A.B.Y. 

The last ... fruit ... from.my ... loins ... That just seems wrong to put into print, somehow.

I can NOT believe that this same itty bitty puddin pop is all growed up enough to attend public school.

Look at the two of them ... traitors!
They BOTH grew up on me!

It seems an impossibility that this adorable little diapered bottom could possibly be turned out into the world

... all by herself ... no safety net... gulp.

Though, this one has moxie ... it can't be denied.

But she done grew up on me ...

Here's proof right here ...

Look at how confident she is. She's got the world by the arse.

Now, she's coming into her own.

Apparently this is code for "Mommy knows nothing and I don't have to listen to her anymore". Yup. My gorgeous little Boo-Bear has learned how best to hone her 'tude. Everyone tells me she is simply testing her boundaries ... just trying to figure out where she belongs in her newly expanded world. 

I have a few suggestions ... like perhaps a priest hole ... or storm cellar for an hour or two to cool her heels.

I had grown accustomed to her older sister's aggressive and loud ways. Had made as much peace with the fact that she was going to have disciplinary issues as we moved through her schooling and subsequent social growth. Stretch is very intelligent, and I am learning this comes with a certain price where her general attitude is concerned ... but my babe ... she was going to be the easier child. She promised me .... with an unconscious consent ... when I whispered it into her little blond curls.

It's like having my heart ripped out of my chest ... still beating with that unfettered adoration of early motherhood ... only to have it dropped to the floor into an un-swept pile of dust bunnies and dog hair ... discarded for a video game, or a match of torture-your-sister-for-shits-and-giggles. 

Such an important part of me longs to weep ... and wept, I have. I finished the 7th book in Diana Gabaldon's Outlander series last week and, not all that far from the end, a major character dies. It is sad ... don't get me wrong - but I wept openly for well over three hours after reading it.


My husband kept walking past me with a look of abject fear on his face ... I'm sure he was thinking I had finally flipped my bicky and was frantically trying to remember where I filed the life insurance policies.

I'm a little better now ... well except that right on the heels of my morose mood ... a vile and evil one moved in. Poor Dani's Hubs ... poor poor Hubs. Send him beer ... and possibly a club ... for protection ... and some kleenex ... and maybe a map to the file cabinet.

You, too can prevent forest fires divorce.

Send help!

...and Captain ... or Wodka ... or Valium ... do it NOW!


The Grasshoppa:Triplets Plus Two Momma said...

ohhhhh, baby dumplins going to school. I forbid it. Well, MINE. She will not go to school.

And I too sometimes cry for hours for no reason, sparked by a book or movie or the empty ice cream container....

brite said...

OMG!!! Those curlz!!! BLONDE CURLZ!!! I wish I could say it's going to get easier, but that would be a bald faced lie. As my brother said to me the day The Max was born (18 years ago tomorrow!!!!) 'Start letting him go now.' Probably the best advice he ever gave me.

*hands DaniHub the Kevlar and crash helmet and recommends lotsa hugs!

Amethyst Anne said...

Wodka on its way!
Such a cutie patootie!!
My heart goes out to you. I agree that it sounds like she is just trying to figure out her boundaries. The best thing I read- that offered not one tiny iota of consolation, was, be more concerned if they are not pushing boundaries- then something is wrong.
The one thing that I can offer up is this, be proud, that you have raised her to exude the confidence and feel strong enough to push boundaries. You are raising one confident and strong little lady there- You are doing a great job Dani!!