Platitude Paradise

It's true... I super can. Being as highly self aware as I have been of late, that knowledge doesn't waft past me like it used to do. Yesterday, I had to run a particularly unpleasant errand on my way home from work. It was something I didn't want to have to do AND, it is in a location that is a nightmare to get in and out of. Long story short, I was in a state of high irritation before I even got there. I got into the parking lot without too much ado, but upon leaving, I had to pull out into one of the worst 'round-abouts' or 'rotaries' in our fair city. It was nearing 4pm and the traffic was already a little on the stupid side. I was turning right, out of the driveway into what immediately turns into 3 solid lanes of traffic - which at that hour of the day, is mostly stopped... waiting for a chance to floor it into the circular nightmare that awaits... and will ultimately spit you out some other exit and send you on your merry way... provid...

I am so friggen blue. I keep telling myself that everything is great, and I just need to shake this off and all will be well... Just shake it off, already. Except... maybe that isn't entirely true.  My 'bestie' expressed her interest in seeing Bohemian Rhapsody with me, as we are both big Queen fans... I agreed. I even followed up when the movie was released. No plans were made. I found out this morning that she has seen it with her boyfriend... and it was aH-MAZing!!  That was hurtful. My birthday was Tuesday. Not a special birthday... but my day. My Mom and middle sister texted me, my father wished me a happy birthday on facebook and my kids completely forgot about it... evidently, so did my youngest sister, as I have still not heard from her. This on the heels of cancelling my party because nobody seemed overly interested in attending. Am I disposable? I feel disposable. I seem to exert a large amount of effort on other people. Wh...

That is what greeted me when I arrived home. Need I go on? Oh... but any of you, whom have been inside my sphere for 30 seconds or so, would know - I will go on... and on. I still smell cat shit. I love my cats very much, I truly do.  Honestly, one in particular.  He's my special boy.  He is also the culprit! The other one has to be super motivated to go down the basement stairs, so I am pretty certain the poop belongs to Moe. Not a common thing for him to do. I moved their litter box.  I showed them where it was, but it was moved.  That may be why. I also denied him the 'out of doors' for a second trip today. He could be pissed about that. I really don't know, maybe he had claimed the basement room.  Now that Stretch is down there, maybe he is acting out by shitting on her bed. Stranger things have happened, right? Bear in mind this was my homecoming welcome from a day that began with my car not starti...

The holiday season is upon us. This is a big fricken deal in my house. We painted our dining room and put up my beloved cards this weekend... and listened to Christmas music by the light of a fire. It was a very nice night. Honestly, it was a really good weekend, all the way around... plus my dining room looks so much better! My hubby is getting on a plane and flying across the country to work for the next few days.  I'm a little sad about that. It seems I'm a little sad about a lot of things right now.  I'm nostalgic... but in a more mopey, than wistful kinda way.  It came to me while I was soaking in the tub this afternoon, what it is that I am missing about Christmas.  You know the feeling I mean... that childish wonderment. The excitement and magic of it all. The innocence.  For all the time I have wondered why I could not recreate the feeling, it never occurred to me what it actually was. It's impossible... I'm not innocent anymor...